Tuesday, February 14, 2006

a failed entomological metaphor whose tenor i have forgotten

i was also about to say that it would be like being assraped by a giant preying mantis, except a preying mantis doesn’t have a penis. but if a preying mantis did have a penis, it would feel like being raped by the sort of penis one would imagine a preying mantis would have—very spiny and long, and green, and sort of elaborately *horned,* and resembling a twig for camouflage. but then if a preying mantis did rape me i suppose i could turn around and bite off its head, which would be pretty gratifying. i would be like “so there!”

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